Mothers Manifesto Part 3: Bill of Rights

This is part three of a three-part manifesto. Click here to start with part one.

Our years managing hundreds of employees in the corporate world told us that it is time to get teenagers ready for college so they don’t react like deer in a headlight their first day of college. High school is the absolute perfect time (and we’ll say again—the last best chance) to intentionally parent our children toward independent, mature, and successful adulthood.

High school is also the time to instill self-confidence and motivation our students need to succeed in today’s world. Our gift to them will be core mental toughness skills to arrive prepared so they’ll flourish, rather than flounder in college. We will gift them with the ability to make wise choices to keep themselves safe and healthy.

AND it is time for mothers to realize that after working their entire lives to raise responsible, caring, good kids, it is their turn. It is a mother’s time to give themselves permission to enjoy life, travel, pursue their dreams… yes, the nest is empty, but the future is full of possibilities for moms everywhere!

 

We believe that all moms (and dads!) are endowed with certain inalienable rights.

  1. Moms have the right to be treated with respect.
  2. Moms have the right to say ‘no’ without guilt.
  3. Moms have the right to have their opinions and feelings heard and valued.
  4. Moms have the right to allow their children to experience the natural consequences of their actions.
  5. Moms have the right to spend their money in any way they choose.
  6. Moms have the right to not blame themselves for how their children turn out.
  7. Moms have the right to not like their children very much sometimes.
  8. Moms have the right to be free of society’s demands for perfection.
  9. Moms have the right to find empathy and support from other moms.
  10. Moms have the right to a life outside of their role as mom.

 

We believe that all young adults are endowed with certain inalienable rights. While your children might not assume these rights until they live independently, the time to prepare your children to claim these rights is during the high school years. It is also the time to mentally prepare yourself to allow your child to claim these rights as they grow into adults.

  1. Young adults have the right to embrace opinions and values that conflict with their parents’ opinions and values.
  2. Young adults have the right to solve their own problems.
  3. Young adults have the right to fail.
  4. Young adults have the right to define themselves as they wish.
  5. Young adults have the right to be the managers of their own lives.
  6. Young adults have the right to privacy.
  7. Young adults have the right to not worry about their parents’ problems.
  8. Young adults have the right to define the amount of emotional distance they have with their parents.
  9. Young adults have the right to be free of being influenced by their parent’s money.
  10. Young adults have the right to ask their parents for advice and then make their own decisions.

 

We acknowledge that mothers and their children do not always have all of these rights today. We also acknowledge that many young adults are not fully prepared to accept the responsibility that goes along with these rights until we prepare them for it. So if you don’t trust your child with the rights above, it’s time to start them on the path. What will you do today?

We empower parents to use this last best opportunity to prepare their children for the uncertainty and demands of college and the adult world. Take positive and powerful steps during the high school years to establish a foundation of trust, respect and love between parent and adult child.

The old saying goes, “Our children are our future.” What kind of future do we as a culture choose? How will our children parent their children? It’s up to us.

Join us! We’d love to hear your ideas. Add your “rights” in the comments section below. We might just add it to our list!

We love comments! Please tell us what you think!